counselling and therapy services
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Connections Counselling Ltd.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ's)
What is the difference
between counselling,
therapy, and
psychotherapy?

The terms "counsellor" and "therapist" are often used interchangeably. "Counsellor" is also a term that is used a lot outside of a mental health setting where just about anyone giving advice can be called a "counsellor".

In a mental health context a "counsellor" is someone who has been trained to work alongside people to help them identify some of the following things: where they are, how they got where they are, where they want to be, and how they are going to get where they want to be. Counsellors in this context rarely (if ever) give advice. They are more concerned to work with clients to help them identify and achieve solutions to their problems. "Counselling" is often used to describe brief work that it targeted at particular problems or situations, with an emphasis on change, especially of behaviour.

"Therapy" is another word that is used in a variety of different contexts where people provide a helping service for someone. In a mental health context "therapy" tends to mean longer term work where the client is encouraged more to focus on underlying thoughts and feelings and motivations. Therapists stand back more from the present behaviour and encourage the client to dig deeper. They are concerned with change, but also with a particular greater self-awareness and understanding.

Because "therapist" can mean anything, in a mental health context people working at this deeper level with clients often distinguish themselves by calling themselves "psychotherapists" - though in practice, in a mental health context, "therapy" and "psychotherapy" are often used interchangeably and can mean the same thing.

In reality there is no clear dividing line between "counselling" and "psychotherapy" and there is considerable overlap between the two. At Connections we provide both, though we firmly believe that sometimes (not always) the answer to immediate issues is found by helping people to dig a bit deeper.

The issue for most clients is not "What do you call it?" but "Is it working for me?"

How long do I have to come for?

Of course, you don't HAVE to come at all. In one sense, you can come for as little or as long as you want to. At Connections we firmly believe that you are the adult paying customer and that you will make you own decisions about your own therapy (hopefully using discussion with us as part of that decision making process).

Behind that question is often a fear that people will get trapped in therapy and have to stay longer than they want to or need. We want to emphasise that we are professional practioners who abide by a code of professional ethics. We will not encourage you to stay longer than we feel is necessary, and you are free to stop the process at any time. We are committed to having regular reviews with clients to check that the process is working for you and to discuss with you what (if anything) still needs to be done.

Some people come for a few sessions, some for much longer. Initially we encourage clients to think in terms of committing for six sessions because it often takes that long to understand the problem, build a therapeutic relationship, and to achieve any change. You will have a sense of whether or not what you want to talk about can be helped in the short or longer term. We once told a couple at at initial session to think in terms of six sessions to begin with, and were greeted with: "Only six! It is going to take a lot longer than that!"

We also find that some people occasionally want to come back for a short period of time after a break. For example you may spend 15 sessions doing some really important work, but then find that two years on, you want to come back for one or two more, to reinforce that change and adapt it to new circumstances. We are happy to offer that facility.

I'm not sure what I want to come for. Is it still ok to come?

It is perfectly ok for you to come and explore things. We often have clients who either are unsure why they have come or who have so many reasons that they cannot pin it down specifically. Part of our work would be to explore and help you clarify and understand, as well as to address any specific issues that arise. We try to have a no risk policy for the first session - we reduce our charge for the first session anyway, and if at the end of it you felt you had wasted your time, say so, and there would be no charge. Similarly, if we felt that it would be inappropriate for you to have counselling with us (for whatever reason), we would say so at the end of the first session and there would be no charge.

How do I get telephone counselling?

Phone counselling is a good option for people who either cannot travel to us, or who can only travel to us occasionally but who want to maintain the counselling, despite the distances involved. So, for example, we have individuals and couples who may travel some distance to see us once or twice, and then continue the counselling via phone. (We are happy to work with couples via phone provided that they are happy to use our conference call facilities (calling in from separate locations) or provided that they have access to two handsets or a speakerphone if they are in the same room.)

We treat phone counselling appointments in the same way that we do face-to-face appointments. You have to book a time for an appointment, and we will provide you with a UK geographic (normal) number to phone us on at the appointment time. Please note that we are happy for you to call (day or evening) to book an appointment or to discuss whether counselling is appropriate for you. However, we will not do counselling work with you without a booking. In other words, we do NOT provide an emergency crisis drop-in (or call-in) service where we are expected to drop everything and respond immediately to you (yes, we are human too, and do have a life to live apart from work). If you want counselling via the telephone, phone or email us and book an appointment.

If we do not know you, and have not worked with you before, we would expect a payment prior to the first session (in addition to you paying your own call charges). You can pay by cheque but the simplest way to do this is via debit or credit card using our secure card payment facilities which we will be happy to explain to you. If you were unhappy with the call, we would gladly make a refund to you in order to protect your consumer rights.

Do you always charge for counselling and therapy?

If we agree to counsel you and if you have an appointment, then, yes, we do charge for our work. Our heating bills are getting bigger just like yours, and our children want trainers too!

Do I always have to travel to you for face-to-face counselling or therapy?

If you live within a 20 mile radius of King's Lynn and want face-to-face counselling and have a condition that prevents you from travelling to us, we may be willing (at our discretion) to travel to you for appointments. However, you would be expected to pay for travelling time and travelling expenses. Phone counselling would be a cheaper option.

Is your counselling and therapy service confidential?

Yes. We offer a professional service, and as part of that professionalism we promise confidentiality. However, there may be very rare occasions when we may wish to talk to another trusted adult about what happens between us - if we felt that your life was at risk, for example. We will explain our confidentiality policy, and the difference between confidentiality and secrecy before we work with you.

What can happen as a result of counselling and therapy?

Of course, each person is an individual, and what can happen will depend on you and the work you are able to do in counselling. We recently (October 2007) received an unsolicited written testimonial from a former grateful client of ours who wanted to tell us what counselling had meant for her. With her permission, we have produced it in full below:

If used correctly counselling can be a tool of strength, an empowering experience - not a sign of weakness or self-indulgence. It can be a window to your inner self - and when you see through the window you gain a greater understanding of who you are and of what you believe in.

This increased self-awareness can be used as a catalyst for change, for self-expression, and for discovery. To undertake this pathway or voyage is exciting but sometimes frightening as you can encounter obstacles of pain, anger, hurts, and past mistakes along the journey.

The hand of the counselling is there with you, not always obviously seen or heard, but as a growing inner strength and awareness. You feel its presence as you receive encouragement and grow in stamina and perseverence to go on. Even when not with the counsellor, you imagine what he or she might say and you learn to make decisions with their voice helping you see things in a new way.

Counsellors never touch you physically, but they will cradle your spirit and embrace your thoughts and emotions. This can be a tremendous comfort, especially when you feel sadness and emotional isolation.

At times counselling will be challenging as you will dislike being confronted by your own negative attitudes or behaviour. This confrontation can raise a strange sense of mixed feelings - of hostility, admiration, and deep respect for the counsellor who remains constant in his or her neutrality, integrity, and non-judgemental stance.

Your destinatinon is the realisation of meaningful relationships, goals, talents, and opportunities for further growth and development, and a belief in one's self, a growing inner peace and guiet happiness. If truly effective, the process of counselling never ends, even after the sessions are completed. You continue to explore and develop new pathways of adventure and self-fulfilment, not only for yourself, but to the benefit of others. Perhaps you may return to counselling at some other point along the road of your journey.

If your counsellor is not trained to an appropriate standard (and these people are) it could be dangerous, and you could potentially be injured along the way. So choose your counsellor carefully. Be bold; be brave; face whatever you need to and this experience could change your life ... forever.

counselling and therapy services


counselling and counsellors © James & Nina Rye 2001-2008. All rights reserved.
Connections Counselling Ltd (Registered in England: No.4361171)
8 Grafton Road, King's Lynn, Norfolk, PE30 3HA, UK
ph.+44 (0)870 740 8669, mob.+44 (0)7050 694775, fax.+44 (0)7050 694776

Worldwide Email, Secure Chat, & Telephone Counselling also available.